Gaming Clichés- Exploding Barrels

Stuck in the middle of a fire fight, red screen pulsating in your face, 5 bullets left in your clip with no grenades. You're surrounded, this is it, your final push for glory. Oh wait, there's a wonderfully placed barrel full of some explosive that will ignite when I shoot a piece of metal through it, and BAAM!!! FREEDOM!!

What is it these days that shooters like to pride themselves on? Call of Duty, Battlefield and Medal of Honour all like to base themselves around making a realistic game that has a fair portrayal of war. Well they're obviously wrong. Why would some intelligent terrorist' A, have a barrel of extremely lethal gas or liquid lying around, B, put it in a conveniently placed choke hold and C, all stand around it in a fight? They wouldn't! I am not a huge master on chemistry but I do not think that there is a widely available liquid or gas that would explode when a slightly hot, small piece of metal penetrates it. Some may say it is propane but I happen to believe that propane is stored in longer cylinders, not bright red barrels. Also, why make them bright red? If there is a risk of your base being stormed and you know that you have very dangerous barrels, why make them stand out? Silly, silly games

But, its not just the bland, generic games that use this awful gaming cliché, masterpieces also have been forced to utilise this reality plot hole. Half Life 2, widely considered to be the greatest game of all time, it reinvigorated the whole of gaming, but sadly it still has fallen into the trap of conveniently placed barrels. However, firing an exploding barrel at a combine with a gravity gun is pretty fun I suppose! Another game, Uncharted 2. As you know its my favourite game ever, but for some reasons the enemies decide to stand round a barrel that is very lethal and full of unstable matter. Why? Surely there must be a heat source somewhere else, ever heard of a thing called a bloody radiator?

Sorry for that horrible rant at an extremely serious matter that, to tell you the truth, is holding back games from developing into something worthy of credit. I can guarantee thought that the next CoD will have glowing barrels of some nuclear device that when shot explodes and melts everyone's face, or that the so called 'magical' Battlefield 3 will be completely spoilt when you have the opportunity to shoot a huge barrel in super slow mo to kill the leader of the evil Nazi space cooperation lead by Darth Vader.

When games decide to drop the barrels, then the games balls will start to drop.

Portal 2 Review

Film buffs have Citizen Kane, music lovers have Sergeant Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band, artists have the Mona Lisa, and us gamers had Portal. Every spanning medium has a certain masterpiece that is loved by everyone, looked upon and set as the pure pinnacle of the skill. The gaming community were blown away when the original Portal was silently released in the Orange Box, and now, Valve have created a full blown sequel to what is considered to be one of the best puzzle games ever. Have they delivered? In short, yes, and damn well!

Whilst the extremely short running time of about 2 hours may have restricted the story in the original Portal, we were still treated to hilarious characters, strange mystery's and an intriguing back story, however, due to the sequel being a stand alone release, Valve have stepped up the story to enormous heights. You play as Chell and at the beginning of the tale you are introduced to a blightly little fella called Wheatley. Loving voiced by Stephen Merchant (The Office), Wheatley guides you through the first few chambers (of which veterans will easily sail through) until you reach the destroyed head quarters of evil robot GLaDOS.We learn that after her demise at the end of the original, Aperture science lab has fallen into chaos. Out of control panels and over grown weeds really give a sense of this previous, living world.

 Later through the story the player encounters new, wider open expanses that require precision shots and more unique solutions. The atmosphere in these areas are simply incredible, mixing together mystery, sadness and intrigue. Along with the newer spaces we are introduced to Aperture founder Cave Johnson, voiced by JK Simmons (Spider Man) who voices the founder with impeccable enthusiasm and passion. Overall, the story is amazing and a real work of art. There are twists and turns which will have you guessing every time this roller-coaster dips. Portal 2 steps up the story from the original from a simple back story, to a full blown narrative which flesh's out the game in such a way that the original Portal feels like a concept demo.

The introduction of the new characters such as Wheatley and Cave Johnson assist the story along, but the voice acting is out of this world. Each of Stephen Merchants lines are read with intelligence and wit, resulting in Wheatley becoming the main source of comedy, another aspect which Portal 2 should pride itself on. Portal 2 is the funniest game ever. Its a bold claim but never have I actual laughed out loud so frequently. The humour may be dark and some lines are simply immature ('Just goes to show that people with brain damage are the real heroes') , but the overall tone of the humour is great and allows a more light hearted side of Aperture to come through, especially with Wheatley's friendly west country accent.

But, James I here you ask, what about the puzzles? Well, calm down, I'm about to explain, god! The basic portal gun is your best friend once again (but this time, with an increased bass). For me, the novelty of having the ability to create endless portals never grows old, but the implementation of the portals, buttons and blocks is wonderful. Moreover, as your progress your arsenal increases. We are shown how to use repulsion gels, acceleration gels, faith plates and excursion tunnels. You are taught how to use and combine the new features slowly and steadily, guiding you by the hand for the first few examples and then by the end letting you experiment with them.

This is what Portal does best. The tests may first feel easy and simple but what we don't realise is that it is slowly guiding and teaching us the basics whilst leading us up to the more challenging puzzles that require deep thought. The learning curve and pacing is pitch perfect, much like the original. Towards the end chambers, you will find yourself ripping your hair out and crying as the solutions are never present, but strangely, the puzzles are never too hard and have the knack to revealing the solution a split second before you snap and storm away. Somehow, Valve manage to make you feel like Gordon Freeman every time you complete a test chamber, gleaming away at how intelligent you feel. If you want a game to cheer you up and make you think you could challnge Einstein in an IQ-off in unexpected ways, Portal 2 is that game.

Sadly, I completed the single player campaign in 7 hours, but I truly believe that Portal (original and sequel) are the perfect examples of quality over quantity. However, the sequel has arrived with a brilliant co-op mode which requires 2 players to solve ever growing harder puzzles, but this time with 4 portals instead of 2. The co-op is a treat as we are given another 7 hour story with another 50 or so test chambers. In spite of the fun aspect, I like to think that in 3 or 4 years time, we will look back at Portal 2 and realise the affects which the co-op has had. I have thrown around the word 'unique' quite a lot this review, but the co-op is one of a kind. It encourages team work like no other game available and it may be the making of new relationships (or breaking, depends how patient you are). Really, the co-op is a must try experience and if you do not have any fun, then you have no soul. Sadly, I have not been able to try out the online offering as the PSN has been down since release day, but from what I have heard, it is lag free and extremely streamlined.

Portal 2 is a beautiful game. Much like my argument with Vanquish, I would much rather pay a full price for a 5 hour game that offers the pinnacle of gameplay and new ideas than buying into a 40 hour campaign that is dull and distilled. Whilst the loading times are poor for a current gen game, once the game has loaded up, the wait will be worth it, and although there is a lack of a new engine, the Source engine still provides Portal 2 with the style and graphical power it needs. Somehow Valve have created yet another masterpiece. Leave the Portal franchise here please, on this beautiful final note.

Funny, clever, intelligent and feel good, Portal 2 is a true masterpiece. Better than Half Life? I'll let you decide.

10/10

Killzone 3 Review

Here it is, Sony's big shooter which will apparently set the standard for FPS shooters to follow. Introducing Move support and of course 3D, Sony have been pushing Killzone 3 down gamings throat for quite a while now, and as it arrives and astounds me in many ways, I cant help but feel that Guerilla games have forgotten what Killzone was all about, instead aiming for a game to fit in comfortably with other FPS' this generation.


In 2009 I was a little naive boy who knew nothing about the wonders of gaming. I had just been given a PS3 and I was one of those people who would buy a game because it looked 'cool' or had lightsabers (darn you Force Unleashed!), so when I saw all the adverts and trailers for a game called Killzone 2, I was intrigued. To cut a long story short, Killzone 2 introduced me into as I like to call 'real' gaming, so Killzone 3 was a huge prospect for me.


Single Player
Here it is. Killzone 3 sits in my Playstation, tempting me in like a beautiful but evil siren. Talking of beauty, the first point I will make and clarify is that Killzone 3 is the best looking game ever to exist. The ruined landscapes stretch for miles and the character animations are almost uncanny. Whilst the last game was heavily criticised for the same old urban, grey settings, Killzone 3 really puts the PS3 to strain with lovely colourful jungles and gorgeous blinding white snowy mountains. Although graphics aren't everything in a game, Killzone 3 is made a all round better experience due to the wonderful scenery and graphics, especially when the same standards are transferred over to multiplayer.


I will admit it, the story is, excuse my French, absolute bull. Some great voice work from Malcom McDowell (Clockwork Orange) and the one and only hard man Ray Winstone are violently dignity-raped by a crap narrative. Some may see it as tongue-in-cheek but to me, it seemed way to serious for my liking. You play as Tomas "Sev" Sevchenko, an empty protagonist with as much personality as a rock. Followed by Mr F-Bomb Rico, you follow the pair through the recently destroyed planet of Helghan. With some reviews you struggle to summarise the plot and not give anything away, but the story is so weak that it doesn't really matter here.


 However, for all the story's down falls, there are some brilliant set pieces and stand out moments that will be in some Top Ten lists by the end of the year. Ranging from an assault on an oil rig or a fight against a huge walking MAWLR, Killzone 3 is more of a compilation of awesome set pieces than an actual involving journey. This feeling is only increased because every time you are meet with a new cut scene, the screen fades into black, completely drawing you out of the experience. However, as soon as the action starts again you are thrown straight back into the intense battles, shame they only last for a maximum of 20 mins before you are unwillingly dragged into another tedious cut scene. Sometimes, I wished I could just leave the cut scenes and just play, but sadly you cant. Overall though, the gameplay and pacing is above par, it is possibly the most intense FPS I have ever played as you are pulled into each level thanks to the outstanding atmosphere and are surrounded by the chilling gargles and glowing red eyes of the Helghast. Add the intense gun battles to full surround sound and a dark room, and you have yourself an unmatchable experience.

The guns on range are pretty good too. You have the classic ISA rifle and then the Shotgun, but the real star is the new Laser Cannon. This gun shoots out weird balls of green energy, making your enemies explode, hilarious. Also, the introduction of the new brutal melee kills means that each time your go for a hand to hand fight, a new animation will appear, usually involving a knife to the face or Kratos thumbs to the eyes. These are great and really satisfying to pull off. Moreover, the inclusion of jet packs for one level seems more like a cheap gimmick, much like the exo-skeletons and ice truck thing. The atmosphere here is top notch as well, at some points you truly believe these people are stuck on a strange planet with no means of escape, but sadly Guerilla haven't used this to create an involving story. Still, the guns and atmosphere are amazing.



But, for all its action and beauty, Killzone just seems to lack something. I don't know exactly what it is, but it just doesn't seem unique any more. Maybe that's because of the new lighter controls. Condemned by most people, Killzone 2 had an incredible sense of weight behind it, setting it apart from the quick fire COD and creating a more involved experience; at least that's what I thought! Guerilla have tweaked the weight considerable and whilst still being heavy, the controls make Killzone 3 feel more like the average shooter, losing part of its original identity. This can also be related to the short campaign as well and awful story. I finished the campaign in 5 hours, a time that is well below satisfactory from the Killzone franchise.



In the end, Killzone 3 is into exactly a let down, but a too-average shooter. Yes the battles are intense and the gameplay is pitched perfectly, but that's not all what a game is. The game has lost its original charm, instead collapsing in to the peer pressure from bigger, similar franchises out there. In spite of the huge push behind it from Sony, Killzone is seeming to slip by quietly as all the fans dig in, but the public by pass it as they wait for the new instalment of CoD. I love it, some people don't, it is a very Marmite game now, and although it hurts me to say it, if you really enjoyed Killzone 2, you may not enjoy Killzone 3, not one for the fans. It just goes to show that by making everything bigger and flasher doesn't always make a game better


Multiplayer
You may be wondering why I have split this review up into two different sections, but like most shooters on the market, it is a very separated game. With a short campaign that delivers in excitement, but not story, Killzone 3 follows the trend which is sadly plaguing this generation. However, saying that, Killzone 3's online mode is near fantastic and certainly able to stand up to the big daddies.


Many people complained about the levelling up system is Killzone 2, and I agreed, it was very slow and the amount of freedom it offered was extremely closed, fortunately, Guerilla have listened to the fans and have delivered a stellar experience with enough choice for chopping and changing that it should satisfy the most OCD players out there. Following in the steps of Battlefield, Killzone introduces the class system. Players can choose between the classic classes; medic, engineer, marksman etc. each offering their own unique abilities. I my self am a medic. Even from this one class I have been able to switch my load-out and buy perks with my upgrade points (like a money system each time you level up) which really add depth to the initial outline of online.


You thought the fights in Cod or Battlefield were intense? Wait till Killzone. I have found myself being outnumbered by millions (slight exaggeration) of enemies or surround by grenades and random explosions, Killzone really gets your heart racing. There is a great balance between all the classes and there is a very steady growth within the community, teams work together most of the time. The gameplay is mainly similar to the campaign bar the lack of cover, but great moves like the brutal melee kills still linger online. Running up to a sniper and giving them a face full of sharpened steel is one of the most satisfying feelings in any online game ever. The graphics are great and I haven't encountered any lag yet, so the online component is certainly strong. 



Overall, whilst the campaign may be a bit short lived, Killzone 3 makes up for it with an incredible online counterpart that will add legs to the game. A wonderful package that, in terms of graphics, is next gen stuff. Killzone 3 is an intense, crazy, manic shooter that deserves a play, even if you are a Halo whore!

7/10

I'm an exclusive whore!

No, its not what you think.

When I say that I am an 'exclusive whore' I don't mean, well, you know what I mean. I am of course talking about the partially dreaded, mainly loved idea of exclusives within gaming. Since game consoles where first introduced, each different iteration has somehow prided its self in a certain game, or even a franchise. Whether it be Super Mario for Nintendo or Halo for Xbox, each console has a certain exclusive that is almost certain to draw in customers and sell the console in huge quantities.

Now, I'm not going to lie; I love exclusives. The one thing that makes me happy on this earth is rubbing the beauty of Uncharted 2 or the size of Gran Turismo into a fellow gamers face. 'Just look at Drake, how the water drips from his curves'. Alright, maybe that's a bit exaggerated, but it is true. The main aspect of any console war will be the exclusives, no doubt.

But, is it all a good thing? In my opinion, although I hate to say it, exclusives are the bane of gaming and without them, we would all live a happy life in harmony. My point is this; when an amazing exclusive is released to wide critical acclaim, such as Halo Reach or Heavy Rain, the critics imply that it is a must buy and a masterpiece in gaming, an opinion that surely means we should all play it. But, what if we cant? As we lock horns in the flaming console war, we have forgotten why we got involved in gaming in the first place, the games. We all love games and that's why we live are lives by them, who cares if it is Xbox or Playstation. Gaming is like films, a magical film deserves all the attention it can get, but unlike gaming, it is open to everyone. I wont deny that I want to play Halo or Alan Wake, and I imagine many of the 'others' will want to play Uncharted or LBP, but we cant, we just cant.

So, surely exclusivity is getting in the way. Companies that fork out millions of pounds for an exclusive franchise are destroying what gaming is all about, it should be a friendly community who all want to experience the best things that gaming has to offer. Take Heavy Rain for example. It was a magical game that showed me what games could achieve. I felt it deserved GOTY in many categories, but it had one major fall back. It was  only on PS3. In my opinion, everyone needed to experience this game, everyone needed to see how games have developed into something close to an art form, but this damn exclusivity is getting in the way. Same can be said for Mass Effect 2. When originally released, it was hugely praised and received some of the highest scores ever seen, but only a select few could play it, even though everyone deserved and needed to play it.

And here we are, gone in a full circle. This generation have forgotten why we love gaming in the first place. Instead of discovering and playing the all round greatest gaming experiences, we just fight that our game is better than yours. The whole gaming community need to open their eyes as we have all become a little to close minded and tunnel visioned on beating our rivals, when really, there shouldn't be any. 2011 see's the arrival of The Last Guardian from Team Ico. I know it will be incredible and a must play experience, but I fear that it will be simply shunted by others and abused by PS3 fanboys. Its sad to see where we have got to.

I will keep repeating it. We need to remember that gaming is about the games, not about which console is better, Instead of creating an experience that would only benefit one pack of wolves, why not open it up and show the whole world what can be achieved, and give everyone the chance to play it? We need to stop the silly fighting and realise that gaming is a real art form, and until we do that, gaming will forever be seen as an immature place for squabbling. If we take ourselves seriously, others will too.

Gaming Clichés- Glowing weak spots

I'm going to try and start a new recurring feature of my blog which will raise some of gamings worst cliches and glitches. The first being this:

 In a time where games are being slowly accepted as an art form, one major problems stays with us, the clichés. The first main one that really irritates me, and in some cases confuses me, is how nearly 1 in 3 games will have a boss battle where you have to aim for some glowing weak spots. Why? You dont see bosses in movies with enormous bright spots that shout 'Shoot me'!, so why do games, which are considered on par with films, suffer from this awful, stale gaming cliché?

I blame Star Wars. I know, its blasphemy to perhaps the greatest film series of all time, but it is true. We all remember the famous scene from the original Star Wars where Skywalker has to fire a laser into a small hole on top of the Death Star which magically makes the whole thing explode. Major fault there. If you had the money to build a space ship, then why cant you fill a hole up that brings no significant advantage to your side, but a huge one to the other? Star Wars weak plot hole has influenced games and the way they handle bosses. Take Vanquish for example; a great game, one of my GOTY's, but much like lots of other games, it suffered one giant unrealistic, lazy technique that is almost unforgivable. Their huge robots had glowing weak spots that, when shot at enough, would explode, destroying your enemy. But, I fail to understand how the Russians can make a powerful robot and somehow leave its major parts unprotected. I understand what developers are trying to do as normally a level boss is in some way hugely overpowering, but some imagination wouldn't go far. Look at the recently released Killzone 3. One of its main set pieces is fighting a giant robot walking thing, but surprise surprise, it has glowing weak spots. Why make them glow? Surely that attracts bullets like moths to a light! 

Well, that's my rant over. Next time I am forced to shoot some red spots, I will throw my controller at the TV screen and write an extremely angry letter to the developers, well maybe not that harsh, but you get my point. 

If you have any more annoying clichés or infamous glitches that you would like me to rant about, feel free to post a comment below. Cheers.

Sad Sad News.......

Now, I imagine you have already heard the sad and terrible news that was released lately. True Crime- of which I was extremely looking forward too- has been cancelled along with the the whole Guitar Hero franchise. Damn you Activision! Anyway, as I said earlier, I thought that True Crime was shaping up to be a really good and due to the original being one of my favourite PS2 games, but sadly, Activision have cancelled it and let the huge success of Call of Duty just float them by. It really annoys me how they can get rid of an intelligent looking, quite original idea for a bland, non-innovative series that, although sells extremely well, is crap. Maybe my hatred for the COD series increases this, but I imagine that quite a lot of the gaming public feel the same. On a related note too. the newly released figures of Enslaved (620,000) is so sad and it makes me feel that developers wont take riks with new IP's and original ideas, as they are afraid they may fail. So, all im saying is that I hate Activision really. Rant over.

Joe Danger Review

Whilst 2010 was certainly a great year for the big AAA titles on the gaming circuit, 2010 also bought us many great third-party indie games. Much like the music industry, times have changed and a new downloadable, digital era is being issued in. Within a huge list of new downloadable games, there are only a few nice and shiny gems, one of which is Joe Danger.

Joe Danger puts you in the motocross boots of an old biker named Joe Danger, who, after a near fatal accident, is trying to get back on the bike and astound the world with his new death-defying tricks. As you can probably tell, the story is not important, but it adds a nice little depth to our friend Joe which beefs him out a bit. However, the area where Joe Danger really accelerates is in its fantastic gameplay. 

With a mix of realistic physics and then insane trickery, Joe Danger is a fast paced, over-the-top masterpiece in game design. Set out like a bits 'n' pieces back garden, Joe Danger has you charmed from the first second you lay eyes on it; and experience that you rarely get bored of. The actual levels are fantastically created, giving the player many different experiences, whether it is trying to get the biggest air or attempting to beat the clock, Joe Danger has a level for everyone. Full of crazy obstacles (such as shark pools), the tracks are incredible as they give you the choice to simply play them once, or learn them and master them, an aspect that many games lack.

 As well as the impressive physics and beautiful tracks, Joe Danger also includes a simple trick system. The tricks are simply pulled off with the shoulder buttons and when combined with a triple back flip or front flip, the experience brings back the memories of classics such as SSX and Tony Hawks. As many challenges consist of combo-ing the whole level 100%, the introduction of wheelies and endo's is a pure godsend. It is great to see the combo meter rising and rising, until the point where you touch your wheels down and a huge score pop's up in your face.

And that's what Joe Danger is about. The over the top, impressive moments which give you the feeling of mastering the game, when you have only been playing it for a few hours.The initial career mode houses many unique challenges; of which you can chose when you wish to attempt them. These challenges range from combo the level to a tense coin dash, but overall, they give this little pokey title a great sense of longevity. Riding alongside a deep long career mode is the, once again, simple sandbox tools. It may not be as deep as other create games such as LittleBigPlanet, but the sandbox mode gives you enough freedom to create a fun track which you can be proud of, and what else do you want really? Accompanying these two modes is the lovely splitscreen races. Just as fun as the single player levels, these offer some new challenges which a great fun to attempt with a buddy.

Overall, Joe Danger is one of the most polished, fun and enjoyable games of 2010, which comes to a great surprise as it was only created by a team of 4 guys, nothing big and fancy. Instead of spending £5 on something menial, I urge you to buy Joe Danger, as it is an incredible little game that deserves you uttermost attention. All I can say is that Joe Danger is the best £5 I have ever spent, and it is a flipping good game. Joe Danger is wonderful.

James Ward

9/10